Thursday, February 3, 2011

Fear ...

I don't know if it is a case of mid-manuscript blues or laziness. I've surpassed the 50k mark on my WIP and crept to a near halt. I have maintained my 5k a week goal for a month and a half now, but this week ... this week it is like I am afraid to write. I know that sounds crazy, but that is what it feels like. I don't know if it is fear of not meeting my weekly goals, I mean after all I am only answering to myself, or if it is fear what I am writing is just not going to be good enough as a whole.

My calender for February is brutal when it comes to things that will cut into my writing time. Hitting my 5k mark will be all but impossible with the mixture of no school days, dentist appointments (not to mention the haze I will be in after my wisdom tooth is cut out), working on normal days off, holidays, an anniversary, and two birthdays!

Spilling all that to my beloved writing partner,  Adriana , yesterday she quietly suggested easing up on myself. Her thought was backing off on the word count goal would allow me to breathe and break through the icy fear, allowing me to move forward, even if at a slower pace. Soo we are going to try that. I've backed the magic goal off to 2k a week for this month, obviously more when/if I can manage it. I ended up with with a little over 900 words yesterday, which are the first words of the week. Not a bad start.

Wish me luck.

Love,

MM

8 comments:

  1. Pushing through those moments of blockage or fear is so important. Don't let it pull you away from your MS for too long at a time. It's the number one challenge I face, so I know what I'm talking about, LOL. One thing that works for me is to take the chapter or scene where I've hit a wall, and pull some aspect or detail out of it. Write about that thing. Don't worry about the exercise being for the chapter -- its best if it isn't intended to go in the book at all. Just play with it, stretch it, turn it on its head -- just for fun. It's amazing how the muse reacts, and often a new path out of the mist appears.

    Good luck with it, and with that wisdom tooth. Ugh. Thinking of you!!

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  2. Thanks, Nicki. I appreciate your advice and will give it a try. It is always great to talk to someone in the same boat.

    As to the wisdom tooth *shudders* I'm not looking forward to that at all! That's next Friday and then I have to work the Wed and Fri after, blowing THREE days off in a row! Ughhh Not good for my writing!

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  3. I knw what you mean. I really want to work on my rewrite, but I have a hundred and twenty things to get done this month.

    Still, I find that I write a lot easier when I don't have a word-count goal in my mind.

    :-)

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  4. I believe Adriana is right. There shouldn't be pressure associated with writing (unless your on a deadline). :)

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  5. The middle for me is always the worst! Just do what you can and don't worry about it. It *will* get done!

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  6. *huggles* you can doooo it, TT! Just remember, you are writing for you first and foremost, and that this is supposed to be FUN! We all have off days or weeks. The important thing is to keep your chin up and keep going as best you can.

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  7. Always wishing you all the success in the world you can muster darling. Finish the book, I could always use the treat.

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  8. I know what you mean, but it's harder to get started again, than to keep going. I agree with backing off the word count. Takes a little stress off and get the muses going again.
    I like your blog, you have a new follower.

    Pamela Jo
    http://theresjustlifeyaliveit.blogspot.com

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